Once, Twice, 5 Times The "Melt"

Joe Swash rises to the bait.

Only he knows why he sent the same message 5 times. He'd do better filling in his CV.

"Get Reem in 20 mins" Hmmm, I don't lnow what "Reem" means so I'll have to assume it's another word for "fucking hideous"

"Essexercise" hahaha, see what they did?

I'd imagine the majority of sales rely on sad cunts who see it as wank material. Not that I'll be doing that of course. I'm happy with my Natalie Cassidy Then and Now workout DVD. Continually rewinding to the bit at the start where she's obese.

Congratulations

A couple of weeks ago at work it was the cleaner's 60th.

The women in the office made a bit of a thing about it and put some banners up, and all's fair enough but among them was this......




One of the most tragic images I've ever seen.

It's hard to think you could put that up without realising how bad it looks.

With Christmas approaching I'm half expecting them to wrap tinsel round her mop.

Wacko Shit Craico

Dr Conrad Murray's involuntary manslaughter sentence has co-incided with the release/advertisement of all manner of Michael Jackson memorabilia.

Repackaged box sets aside - amongst the Idle gossip at work today I overheard someone crowing about how great "The Michael Jackson experience" is on the Nintendo Wii. And how it's a must have for christmas.

Money's tight in our house this year so I'm going to have to improvise.

I'm just gonna lay in bed taking various medicines, hastily announce a 40 date UK tour and then have a cardiac arrest.

All i really want at the minute is to be laid in bed watching Cast Away with a couple of Page 3 stunners by my side feeding me burgers.